• Allison

This Side of Perfect

The garage door burst open the minute I pulled into the garage and shut off the car. It was Elliott carrying an armload of scraps from our ongoing basement renovation and he was practically running. “Mom! Can I be the first one to hold the baby?”

“Yep,” I answered with a smile. “Just let me bring a few things in.” This, I was excited for. I loved getting to watch the excitement of the other kids when a new baby enters the family.

On the way home from the hospital I had been fighting back tears threatening at the corners of my eyes. Having a new baby reminded me of how much I’d lost. The smell of fresh baby skin, the feel of the hospital bed, the sound of the baby breathing, even just the scent of the fresh cut flowers resting next to the window.

Yes, I’m out of this world thrilled about my baby girl. But the joy is interwoven with the pain of missing my other child. And I’m learning that’s ok.

As Rhett shared his favorite story with his sister, another asked if they could pick out her clothes for the next day, and the others took turns holding and snuggling, I looked around me and was overwhelmed by how blessed I truly am.

Everything here on earth doesn’t have to be perfect in order to have peace. It doesn’t all have to be healed in order to have hope.

We can rejoice even in the midst of rejection. We can continue to move forward even when everything in life makes us want to throw in the towel. We can still be grateful even when life doesn’t feel so great.

Honestly, I struggle living with this in-between here on earth. I want to fix all the problems, have the answers for all the questions and right all the wrongs. But if I'm expecting perfection earthside I’m just gonna be left disappointed.

We simply cannot see all that God is doing on this side of eternity. We weren’t made to know all the details or understand it all.

Instead, we must trust Him in the process, remembering that, “...our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal,” (2 Corinthians 4:17-18).


© 2019 by Allison Brost

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